{"id":344,"date":"2015-06-07T16:01:01","date_gmt":"2015-06-07T16:01:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/?p=344"},"modified":"2026-06-24T05:46:23","modified_gmt":"2026-06-24T05:46:23","slug":"cracked-tim-burtons-version-of-willy-wonka-in","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/?p=344","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"<div id='gallery-1' class='gallery galleryid-344 gallery-columns-3 gallery-size-thumbnail'><figure class='gallery-item'>\n\t\t\t<div class='gallery-icon landscape'>\n\t\t\t\t<a href='https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/?attachment_id=345'><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/tumblr_npjfhzIgLv1qz5q5lo1_500-150x150.gif\" class=\"attachment-thumbnail size-thumbnail\" alt=\"\" \/><\/a>\n\t\t\t<\/div><\/figure>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/cracked.tumblr.com\/post\/120935252483\/tim-burtons-version-of-willy-wonka-in-true\" class=\"tumblr_blog\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">cracked<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>Tim Burton\u2019s version of Willy Wonka, in true slasher style, chooses his victims in advance, using \u201cthe system.\u201d It\u2019s all actually very Dexter-ish.<\/p>\n<p>When Willy Wonka meets the five children who have golden tickets and their families for the first time, he tells Mike Teavee, \u201cYou\u2019re the little devil who cracked the system.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Mike explains \u201cthe system\u201d during his TV interview, saying: \u201cAll you had to do was track the manufacturing dates, offset by weather, and the derivative of the Nikkei Index.\u201d Now, that makes absolutely no sense to me, but it was obviously correct, as he only had to buy one candy bar to find his golden ticket. But why does that matter? Well, if there is a system, we can therefore assume that Willy Wonka had a plan for where the chocolate bars containing the golden tickets would be distributed: It was not random. And this is alarming on an extremely important level\u2026 It\u2019s all part of \u201cthe system\u201d: Willy Wonka chose Charlie Bucket to be his heir long before he found the money or the golden ticket. And the other golden-ticket holders? Carefully chosen victims.<\/p>\n<h2><b><a href=\"http:\/\/www.cracked.com\/blog\/6-reasons-burtons-willy-wonka-actually-serial-killer\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">6 Reasons Burton\u2019s Willy Wonka Is Actually A Serial Killer<\/a><\/b><\/h2>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Tim Burton is weird, and twisted and very dark, which is why I like(ed) his work. The stuff of late though has just been weird, like too far out in left field weird. But this!?! If this is actually true, I\u2019d have to say this is the most twisted and darkest Mr. Burton has ever gotten, and if so, it sheds some new light on an otherwise mediocre movie at best (I like a good cover song, but a remade movie is a hard sell sometimes).<\/p>\n<p><\/p>\n<p>P.S. This gif of Johnny Depp is damned creepy&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>cracked: Tim Burton\u2019s version of Willy Wonka, in true slasher style, chooses his victims in advance, using \u201cthe system.\u201d It\u2019s all actually very Dexter-ish. When Willy Wonka meets the five children who have golden tickets and their families for the first time, he tells Mike Teavee, \u201cYou\u2019re the little devil who cracked the system.\u201d Mike [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"gallery","meta":{"wprm-recipe-roundup-name":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-description":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[59,60,57,58],"class_list":["post-344","post","type-post","status-publish","format-gallery","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-charlie-and-the-chocolate-factory","tag-johnny-depp","tag-tim-burton","tag-willie-wonka","post_format-post-format-gallery"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/344","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=344"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/344\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":346,"href":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/344\/revisions\/346"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=344"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=344"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.grunk.xyz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=344"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}